...so i touched it.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
