So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
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