bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
