I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
This is my gift to your gina
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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