I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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