I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Sober January is a disaster.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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