dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize