Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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