just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I am naked and annoyed.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Randomize
