whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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