dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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