nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
