Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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