your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
