i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
