It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
