dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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