David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize