I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize