i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize