I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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