She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize