Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Randomize
