hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Bring me that man meat
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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