M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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