the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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