Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
