She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
