watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize