opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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