as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize