so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Randomize
