Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
