I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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