I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
farters have to be the big spoon...
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
