Buhtt sex?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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