i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
