Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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