I want to walk on stilts...naked
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Randomize
