Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
