"it" just moved
I have demons in me.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
