babies were throwing up all over the place
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
