If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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