You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
