we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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