Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Randomize
