Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
