He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
