I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
