Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
