that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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