It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
