Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize
